There are two kinds of people: those who are nice and those who are naughty. Santa made those lists. He checked them twice. There are no negotiations. For the baddies, I present my own list—checked twice, of course—of fun holiday parties where you are free to be naughty. That is, until the burly, not-so-jolly doorman bounces you out of there for exceeding the naughty limit.

As you may have in our Short List, SantaCon is coming to town. For those of you thinking, That sounds fun. I just wish there were more bikes involved, the Urban Bike and Social Club will host the Bad Santa Holiday Social Ride and Pub Hop on Wednesday, Dec. 12. Meet at Cal Coast Bicycles (3020 Adams Ave. in Normal Heights) at 6:30 p.m. sharp in a ridiculous Christmas costume. The group will ride through uptown and Downtown neighborhoods, hitting bars along the way. Let's hope this doesn't mean a pile-up of Santas on University Avenue.

The lump-of-coal-in-the-stocking-worthy shenanigans continue on Friday, Dec. 14, with Santa's Naughty Variety Show at The Ruby Room (1271 University Ave. in Hillcrest). Hosted by drag queen Ophelia Later, the show includes Pink Boombox burlesque performers shaking their cookies, standup comedy from Kim Thompson and live music from Mimi Zulu and Friends, Tori Rogg, Soul Ablaze and Gabriel Joseph. If you start suffering from naughty-list guilt, you can buy art and other goods from local designers and artists for your loved ones at an onsite Secret Santa Workshop.

Finally, shake the bits that probably put you on the naughty list at El Dorado (1030 Broadway, Downtown). Blancnoire, Damn Juelz, Contemporary Menswear and Adam Salter will provide the music. Make sure to drag your drunken self into the Xmas photo booth—just don't get XXX in there. Someone has to clean that up.


Write to alexz@sdcitybeat.com. You can also bug her on Twitter.

Calendar

  • Visit one of the 70 participating restaurants, bars, coffeehouses and nightclubs in town on this night and 25 to 50 percent of sales will go to local HIV/AIDS services and prevention programs. 
  • Anthony Bernal and Chris Ward, who are vying to replace Todd Gloria on the San Diego City Council, will discuss urban issues, such as parking, homelessness and new developments
  • The new exhibition designed by Dave Ghilarducci is made from hundreds of rolls of packing tape and bound together by layers of plastic shrink-wrap. Visitors can navigate their way through cocoon-like passageways...
  • The renowned Mexican black and white photographer presents an exhibition exploring the principal themes within three groups: "Bestiarium"," Fantastic Women" and "Silent Natures."
  • Presented by Pacific Arts Movement, the sixth annual mini film fest features 14 film programs from 10 countries that includes everything from docs to romantic tearjerkers. See website for full lineup and...
  • The San Diego County Bike Coalition hosts this monthly bike-in happy hour event to get biking residents involved in their communities and discuss bike projects planned for that specific community
  • Debunk some of the stereotypes surrounding cannibalism at this new exhibition that takes a hands-on approach to the subject. Includes video games and interactive activities where patrons will have to decide...
  • So Say We All's monthly storytelling night features stories about those jobs we took because we had to take a job. Featured readers include Allison Gauss, Annmarie Houghtailing, Cecile Estelle, and more
  • Artists from the all-abstracts group show will talk about their work and techniques. Artists include Edwin Nutting, Danielle Nelisse, Leah Pantea, Lenore Simon, and more
See all events on Thursday, Apr 28