After an arduous day of wading in a sea of cosplayers at San Diego Comic-Con, there's nothing I like better than to escape the crowds and enjoy a frosty Romulan ale at the nearest watering hole. Unfortunately, this is difficult to accomplish, given that we're still 50 years away from First Contact, let alone the introduction to Romulan intoxicants.
Now, you're probably thinking, Why not just emit a phased inverse tachyon pulse to cause a temporal rift and jump directly to the alpha quadrant in year 2373 after the Federation has lifted its ban on the substance? Well, sure, that'll work if you don't mind being thrust into the heart of the Dominion War just to get a drink! LOL!
Just because you're unwilling to flout a linear approach to space-time doesn't mean you should be robbed of delicious neurotoxins when you need them most. Luckily, there are two appropriately geeky brew fests this week to fill that gap.
On Wednesday, July 17, Stone Brewing Co. will open the first ever Hop-Con at the Stone Brewing World Bistro & Gardens in Liberty Station (2816 Historic Decatur Road, Suite 116). Based on the event name, I assumed they were going to unveil a gilded hop cone idol and have Stone Brewing CEO and High Priest Greg Koch chastise nonbelievers to pay it homage, but they have something much more conventional planned. The Hop-Con is an evening-long celebration of Stoneís newest collaboration brew.
So, what makes this beer convention-worthy? Rather than follow standard collaboration protocol by combining efforts with other breweries of note, Koch reached out to two friends / Internet luminaries to design it. Actor and geeky DIY enthusiast Wil Wheaton and Fark.com creator Drew Curtis helped build the Stone Farking Wheaton w00tstout—a 13-percent-ABV imperial stout made with wheat(on) malt, pecans and some bourbon-barrel aging. The event will feature samples of the undeniably l33t quaff (as well as a to-go bottle), appetizers and live performances from Wheaton and comedy duo Paul & Storm.
If the beer sounds compelling, but you were hoping for a con event that was a tad more Spandexy, the Heroes Brewfest will have you covered. This festival should have everything convention attendees crave: beer from dozens of breweries, live music performances (on a stage powered by the sun's yellow rays, not unlike certain Kryptonians) and, since costuming is encouraged, it also will likely feature a pleasantly tipsy Batman at some point. If anyone deserves a day off, it's that guy.
The Heroes Brewfest will descend on Embarcadero Park North on Saturday, July 20, from 1 to 5 p.m. VIP-ticket holders and sufficiently diabolical super-villains can get into the event one hour earlier. All attendees will be outfitted with two Bracelets of Victory containing a total of 20 taster tickets (whose capacity to deflect bullets is presently unconfirmed), with additional taster tickets available for purchase. There will also be a Costumed Crusader Contest with prizes available for those fortunate individuals who haven't managed to completely sweat through their convention garb in the previous three days of activity.
Write to email@example.com and firstname.lastname@example.org. Ian blogs at iancheesman.wordpress.com and you can follow him on Twitter @iancheesman.