And just when sequels seemed enjoyable again. Fresh off of the pure joy and exhilaration that is Magic Mike XXL, now we must endure Terminator: Genisys. With a running time of 126 minutes, your patience for rote action banality will be tested. Calling this cinematic cow patty a sequel might be generous, as it quite literally mashes up the timelines of every other Terminator movie to create something new? Nah, something borrowed.
The plot is fatty; bloat like this doesn't exist unless you're fishing a body out of the river. Mankind's super savior John Connor (Jason Clarke) sends Kyle Reese (Jai Courtney) back to save his mother Sarah Conner (Emilia Clarke) from a muscle bound killer robot (Arnie!). Things get messy and catchphrases blow like apocalyptic hell fire. Sound familiar?
Just when you think director Alan Taylor might have the balls to literally do a shot-for-shot remake of James Cameron's original The Terminator, he throws a time-traveling wrinkle into the mix. Like all of these films, there's very little room for logic. Plot threads from Terminator 2: Judgment Day randomly intertwine, because, why not? The blasé monochromatic visuals look like they've been taken directly from the cutting room floor of Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines.
Poor Schwarzenegger is propped up as the buffoon and aged mentor, the one who does all the heavy lifting and heavy feeling. The "humans" simply react to things that go boom and robots that go boo. Action scenes are cut together within an inch of their life, while the special effects do little to enhance the scope and scale.
Fans of the series thus far might get a kick out of how haphazardly meta the entire film seems, but this isn't smart or enjoyable filmmaking. The innovation in Terminator Genisys stops after its creative spelling mistake.
Classic Films at the Ken Cinema: Come experience a week of classic cinema with screenings of Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, From Here to Eternity, Grey Gardens, Jaws, Some Like it Hot, La Dolce Vita, and The Tales of Hoffman. Opens Friday, July 3, and screens through Thursday, July 8. For more information on this series go to landmarktheatres.com.
Güeros: A misbehaving teenager is sent to stay with his college-age brother during a university strike, giving the duo time to search for the legendary folk singer their father loved so much.
Magic Mike XXL: The pelvic-thrusting gang of strippers is back for a rowdier sequel to the 2012 breakout hit.
Terminator: Genisys: Arnie always makes good on his promises. He's back.
The Nightmare: An immersive documentary by Rodney Ascher on the crippling phenomenon of sleep paralysis. Screens through Thursday, July 8, at the Digital Gym Cinema in North Park.
One Time Only
Top Gun: Take me to bed or lose me forever. Screens at 8 p.m. Wednesday, July 1, at The Pearl Hotel in Point Loma.
Roman Holiday: Audrey Hepburn plays a touring European princess who takes a night off in Rome and meets a handsome American. Screens at 8 p.m. Thursday through Sunday, July 2 5, at Cinema Under the Stars in Mission Hills.
The Overnighters: A pastor in a North Dakota town opens his church up to homeless people looking to find work at nearby oil fields. Screens at 6:30 p.m. Monday, July 6, at the San Diego Central Library in East Village.
For a Woman: A young filmmaker and her sister discover a box of old photos that lead them on a journey of self-discovery regarding their family's past. Screens at 6 p.m. Tuesday, July 7, at the Point Loma / Hervey Branch Library.
The Empire Strikes Back: Luke Skywalker (Mark Hamill) moves closer to finding out the truth about his dark family history while Han Solo (Harrison Ford) and his crew attempt to outrun Darth Vader's military forces. Epsisode V of the Stars Wars series is considered by most to be the best. Screens at 8 p.m. Wednesday, July 8, at The Pearl Hotel in Point Loma.
A Little Chaos: During the reign of King Louis XIV, two landscape artists fall in love while designing portions of Versailles. Starring Kate Winslet, Alan Rickman, Stanley Tucci and Matthias Schoenaerts.
Escobar: Paradise Lost: Benicio del Toro stars as drug kingpin Pablo Escobar, whose young niece becomes romantically entangled with an American surfer played by Josh Hutcherson (The Hunger Games).
Fresh Dressed: Hip-hop and fashion collide in this pop-culture documentary that celebrates the merging of art forms and culture. Screens through Thursday, July 2, at the Digital Gym Cinema in North Park
Infinitely Polar Bear: Mark Ruffalo plays a manic-depressive father who finally decides to get his act together and begin raising his two spirited daughters.
Manglehorn: Al Pacino plays an elderly locksmith who roams around his rural Texas town reminiscing about the love of his life who left him decades before. Screens through Thursday, July 2, at the Digital Gym Cinema in North Park.
Max: After helping U.S. Marines in Afghanistan, a dog returns to his handler's family after suffering a traumatic experience.
Ted 2: The thunder buddies return for another dose of vulgarity, boozing and hilarity.
The Connection: Jean Dujardin stars as a French police officer who spends years trying to track and arrest one of the country's most notorious drug traffickers.
The Overnight: A family new to Los Angeles gets a wild introduction during a "play date" with another family.
Dope: Malcolm escapes his tough neighborhood by attending an underground party that leads him and his friends on a Los Angeles adventure.
Inside Out: Pixar goes inside the mind of a twelve-year-old girl and finds something ethereal, resonant and powerful.
Me and Earl and the Dying Girl: The title really says it all. Get ready for some precious cinephile self-reflection.
The Wolfpack: Sequestered in an expansive and dank apartment, the Angulo children learn about the world from their massive movie collection in Crystal Moselle's documentary.
Jurassic World: Velociraptors in mirror are closer than they appear.
Results: Andrew Bujalski's sweetly offbeat romantic comedy features Guy Pearce and Cobie Smulders as personal trainers whose relationship gets complicated after a new client (Kevin Corrigan) comes into the picture.
Entourage: The popular HBO show about a movie star and his childhood friends making it big in Hollywood gets the big-screen treatment.
Testament of Youth: Vera Brittain's WWI memoir is told from the perspective of a woman seeing the futility of war for the first time.
Insidious: Chapter 3: Round three in the ongoing battle between white suburbia and the supernatural hereafter. Go!
Love & Mercy: Brian Wilson of the Beach Boys gets the biopic treatment in a story that covers pivotal moments in the 1960s and 1980s. Starring Paul Dano and John Cusack.
Spy: Melissa McCarthy steps out from behind the desk and into the field in this spy comedy from director Paul Feig (Bridesmaids).
Aloha: Cameron Crowe tries to resuscitate his career with this long-delayed (not a good sign) drama about a military man based in Hawaii trying to rediscover love.
San Andreas: "What a disaster."
—Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson.
Tomorrowland: George Clooney and Britt Robertson star in Brad Bird's space adventure about a young girl who finds a ring that opens up an alternate universe.
Mad Max: Fury Road: George Miller's infamous policeman-turned-road-warrior returns to the big screen in what looks like one long bonkers chase through a dystopic desert. Tom Hardy reprises the role made famous by Mel Gibson.
Far From the Madding Crowd: Carey Mulligan and Matthias Schoenaerts star in Thomas Vinterberg's adaptation of Thomas Hardy's sweeping romance about a fiercely independent woman who struggles to choose between three suitors.
Hot Pursuit: An uptight cop played by Reese Witherspoon tries to protect the vivacious widow of a Mexican drug boss while being pursued through Texas by a collective of bad guys..
Avengers: Age of Ultron: The brood of Marvel superheroes are back to battle the nefarious Ultron, who has plans to take over the world.
Ex Machina: Set in the near future, Alex Garland's sci-fi film tells the story of an Internet mogul who convinces one of his employees to conduct a Turing test on his newest A.I. creation.