Birdemic: Shock and Terror: Plan 9 From Outer Space. Showgirls. Troll 2. And now there's Birdemic. Seriously, James Nguyen's odd homage to Alfred Hitchcock's The Birds is fucking terrible. It's poorly written. It's poorly acted. It's poorly directed. And you, dear reader, could create better special effects on your MacBook Pro. I know, you're thinking, Hey, I don't know anything about special effects! But neither did the dude Nguyen hired to do the special effects for the movie. It screens at midnight on Saturday, July 24, at the Ken Cinema, so swing by early, get your tickets and then go have a lot of drinks. Because even though it's so bad, you'll enjoy the hell out of watching it with 400 other inebriates. And when it's done, you'll stagger outside, thinking, Man, I could have made better special effects than that.
The Room: Speaking of bad movies, Tommy Wiseau's The Room has often been referred to as the Citizen Kane of bad movies. The weird-ass dark comedy, which Wiseau wrote, directed, produced and starred in, played midnight screenings in L.A. for years before finding a wider audience. Sure, it's been to San Diego before, but this screening is special because Wiseau will be in the audience. Is it intentionally as bad as it seems? Ask him yourself at midnight, Friday, July 23, at the Ken Cinema.
Breathless: This gorgeous new print celebrates the 50th anniversary of Jean-Luc Godard's amazing debut.
Kisses: A sweet little Irish film about two young runaway teens in Dublin.
The Love Ranch: Helen Mirren and Joe Pesci—both of whom have Oscars, remember—star in this look at the early days of Nevada's brothel industry.
Ramona and Beezus: There's a perfectly good chance this adaptation of Beverly Cleary's book will be charming. Or it might destroy your childhood memories.
Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Undead: This play-within-a-playwithin-a-movie satire adds vampires and Ralph Macchio to the mix. See our review on Page 21.
Salt: Angelina Jolie is a CIA agent who beats down a ton of people after she's accused of being a Russian spy.
ONE TIME ONLY
Lucky Number Slevin: This gangster film, starring Josh Hartnett, Bruce Willis, Ben Kingsley and Morgan Freeman, is being presented as a singles mixer by the San Diego Jewish Film Festival. Oy. Screens at 7 p.m. Wednesday, July 21, at Cinema Under the Stars in Mission Hills.
Step Brothers: Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly are dudes suffering from arrested development who become bros when their respective parents get together. Screens at 8 p.m. Wednesday, July 21, at The Pearl Hotel in Point Loma. Free.
Fight Club: We heard about this great club, it's called Fight Club. It's got some rules, but we totally forgot what they are. Screens at 8:30 p.m. Wednesday, July 21, at Stone Brewing World Bistro & Gardens in Escondido. Free.
Scribble No. 2: The latest documentary from Mark Murphy is part of the Comic-Con reception of the art show Survey Select, which kicks off at 6 p.m., Thursday, July 22, at the Wonderbread Factory, Downtown.
The Cove: There's a reason this look at annual dolphin slaughters in Japan won the Best Documentary at the Oscars in February. Screens at 7 p.m. Thursday, July 22, at the Birch North Park Theatre. See Page 13 for details about a pre-film mixer and pre- and post-film Q&As.
A Hard Day's Night: The Museum of Photographic Arts puts on a kick-ass movie party once a month. This day-in a-life look at the Beatles is one of the first music videos ever created, and you can sip cocktails from Alchemy while scoping snapshots from Graham Nash's exhibit. Oh, and there's live music from Rafter. The party starts at 7, and the film rolls at 8 p.m. Thursday, July 22, at MoPA in Balboa Park.
Eraserhead: It's fitting that you have to swing by Zirk Ubu's website to even find out where the urban circus collective is screening David Lynch's dystopian freak show at 8 p.m. Thursday, July 22.
Bee Movie: After being mostly MIA since the end of Seinfeld, Jerry buzzes in as an animated bee. Screens at 8 p.m. Thursday, July 22, poolside at the Handlery Hotel in Mission Valley. Free.
Happy Accidents: Marisa Tomei is Rudy, a New Yorker who thinks she's finally found the right guy in Vincent D'Onofrio's Ben. That is, until he tells her he's a time traveler from the future. Screens at 8:30 p.m. Thursday and Friday, July 22 and 23, at Cinema Under the Stars in Mission Hills.
A Hero's Welcome: Documentary about John Finn and other Medal of Honor winners. Screens at 5:30 p.m. Friday, July 23, at UltraStar Mission Valley.It's free, but you have to e-mail firstname.lastname@example.org to reserve a seat.
The Blind Side: Deserving or not, Sandra Bullock sure was gracious when she accepted her Best Actress Oscar for this one. Screens at dusk, Friday, July 23, at Market Creek Plaza in Lincoln Park. Free.
Serving in Silence: Glenn Close stars in this biopic of Margareth Cammermeyer, who was in the army for more than 20 years before being kicked out for being gay. Part of the Sapphic Cinema series, it screens at 7 p.m. Friday, July 23, at The Center in Hillcrest.
E.T.: Who makes calls anymore? E.T., text home. Screens at 8 p.m. Friday, July 23, poolside at the Handlery Hotel in Mission Valley. Free.
Jason and the Argonauts: If only the new Clash of the Titans had been this awesome. Starts at dusk, Friday, July 23, at Screen on the Green in front of the Museum of Art in Balboa Park. Free.
Outsider Art on Film: This collection of films about self-taught artists runs from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. Saturday, July 24, at the Mingei Museum in Balboa Park.
Ink Heart: Young Resa discovers that her writer dad (Brendan Fraser) can actually bring his characters to life. Too bad he's written some nasty villains, like Paul Bettany's Dustfinger.Screens at 8 p.m. Saturday, July 24, poolside at the Handlery Hotel in Mission Valley. Free.
The Lady Vanishes: Margaret Lockwood stars in the Hitchcock classic about a young socialite who notices that an older woman on her train has gone missing. Screens at 8:30 p.m.Saturday and Sunday, July 24 and 25, at Cinema Under the Stars in Mission Hills.
Shrek 2: Is this the one with Justin Timberlake? No? Forget it, then. Starts at dusk, Saturday, July 24, at the South Promenade at Liberty Station. Free.
Repo! The Genetic Opera: Any futuristic musical about organ repossession with Paris Hilton can't be all bad, can it? Screens at 11 p.m. Saturday, July 24, at the Gaslamp Stadium theater.
Greenberg: The latest from The Squid and the Whale director Noah Baumbach is an observational character piece starring Ben Stiller as Greenberg, a guy who can't accept that life didn't work out the way he had hoped. Screens at 6:30 p.m. Monday, July 26, at the Central Library, Downtown. Free.
The Big Lebowski: The dude abides at 7 and 9:30 p.m. Monday, July 26, at the Birch North Park Theatre.
48 Hour Film Project screenings: You know the 48 Hour Film Project, right, in which teams of filmmakers scramble to complete a project in just two days? Here are the fruits of their labor. Some will be great. Others will suck. You get the idea. Screens at 6 and 8 p.m. Wednesday and Thursday, July 28 and 29, at UltraStar Mission Valley.
Beautiful Losers and Scribble.08: Two terrific documentaries about art and the artists who art it. Part of the Survey Select show, it begins at 7 p.m. Wednesday, July 28, at the Wonderbread Factory, Downtown.
Leap!: Advertised as picking up where The Secret left off. That should either persuade you or dissuade you. Screens at 7 p.m., Wednesday, July 28, at Vision: A Center for Spiritual Living in Clairemont Mesa.
Blazing Saddles: Mel Brooks? Check. Blistering satire? Check. Insightful thoughts on racism? Check. One of the first films to feature farts on screen? Double-check. Screens at 8 p.m. Wednesday, July 28, The Pearl Hotel in Point Loma. Free.
Monty Python and the Holy Grail: Run away! Run away! Screens at 8:30 p.m. Wednesday, July 28, at Stone Brewing World Bistro & Gardens in Escondido. Free.
Restrepo: This documentary keeps the cameras on a U.S. platoon in one of the most dangerous parts of Afghanistan for a solid year. Harrowing.
Great Directors: A documentary that closely examines filmmakers such as Bernardo Betalucci, David Lynch, Agnes Varda, Todd Haynes, John Sayles and others. Question is, where does director Angela Ismailos fit in? Ends July 22 at the Ken Cinema.
Inception: Christopher Nolan's follow-up to The Dark Knight is epic, complex and beautiful. In short, it's the stuff that dreams are made of.
For a complete listing of movies playing locally, please see “On Screen” at sdcitybeat.com.