Feb. 9 2011 10:35 AM

Holy penis pump! It's a whole bunch of stories dedicated to the boom-boom!

sexmain

How on Earth did we travel from 2nd- and 3rd-century Christian martyrs named Saint Valentine to the irreverent exploration of matters of sexuality you have in your clammy mitts right now? That is a very, very good question. And we're sorry to admit that we don't have a very, very good answer—other than to say that since modern corporate society has so shamelessly exploited Valentine's Day for economic purposes, we might as well exploit it for a few cheap thrills? Hey, we're just being true to our nature as Americans who've likely misplaced our moral compass.

Throughout The Sex Issue, we try online dating, profile the man behind the penis pump, take a peek at clown porn, get real about gay-male sex, consider taking on multiple partners, provide pointers for seducing hipster girls, shop for sex toys, chat with a very naughty young lady from Escondido and ask probing questions of a Savage Mexican sexpert.

Please keep this issue out of the hands of your children and your uptight neighbors.

—David Rolland



I Can Has Sex Pleez
Dating and doing it with the internet






Schlong saga
The story behind Ocean Beach's penis-pump innovator




Why (not) Clown porn?
Meet the man behind the mess
of makeup




Sex and the mind of the 'mo
What are you thinking about at
this very moment?






Attracting a crowd
For polyamorists, it takes more than two to tango







How to score with a hipster girl
A quick list of pickup techniques






Riley Steele magnolia
An Escondido girl talks about making a sudden splash in porn and piranhas






Ask a Savage Mexican
Sex advice from a sexpert hybrid


Calendar

  • The renowned Mexican black and white photographer presents an exhibition exploring the principal themes within three groups: "Bestiarium"," Fantastic Women" and "Silent Natures."
  • Presented by Pacific Arts Movement, the sixth annual mini film fest features 14 film programs from 10 countries that includes everything from docs to romantic tearjerkers. See website for full lineup and...
  • Debunk some of the stereotypes surrounding cannibalism at this new exhibition that takes a hands-on approach to the subject. Includes video games and interactive activities where patrons will have to decide...
  • The former local boy and creator of the highly influential blog, Advanced Style, will be signing and discussing his third book, Advanced Style: Older and Wiser, which features inspiring pictures and stories...
  • C.J. Chenier and Bonsoir Catin headline this annual Cajun inspired festival. Also enjoy 10,000 pounds of crawfish, dancing and cooking demonstrations. Held at Spanish Landing Park, across from the...
  • A Cinco de Mayo party featuring $2 tacos, cocktails and live music from Bostich+Fussible, Javiera Mena and Gepe
  • A spoken word showcase hosted by English instructor Karla Cordero and her City College students. There will also be a special reading from poet Mercedez Holtry, as well as an art and photography show....
  • Widely known as host of "Weekend Update" on Saturday Night Live and for his role in the Showtime dramedy Weeds, Kevin Nealon brings his unique humor back to the stand-up stage
  • New works from over a dozen UCSD undergraduate students. Participating artists include Charity Algarme, Richard Lin, Joseph Maas, Ignatius Nguyen, and more
  • This video art exhibition from UCSD MFA candidate Stefani Byrd features two installations that explore the themes of breath, mediation, and the nature of time. Takes place in the VAF Performance Space,...
See all events on Thursday, May 5