Aaryn is an opinionated woman who will say anything and stop at nothing when it comes to fighting for racial and social justice. She has a penchant for 4-inch heels, straight-ahead jazz, and beautifully structured sentences. She's deeply committed to her family yet she refuses, under any circumstance, to deny her lust for Javier Bardem. Though...lately, Michael B. Jordan has been blowin' her hair back; it's safe to say, May-December romances are more socially acceptable than ever. Aaryn will tirelessly—and to the death—defend Monica Lewinsky, and not just because she has enviable hair: We all know that if we were in her MLew's shoes, we'd have walked that same damn mile in a blue Gap dress. Ms. Belfer would like to officially change her name to Aaryn Darling because she likes the way it sounds upon being introduced at cocktail parties.

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With a murder rate 25 times that of other developed countries, America is definitely exceptional. We must be the best at everything, everywhere, and when it comes to gun violence, we've outdone ourselves
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Well, well, well. Or, as my friend Justin says, w-AY-al! I'm not trying to be all vindicated or anything, but I'm feeling sort of vindicated

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