"I'm a local reformist activist and... as early as November the Libertarians, the Greens and the reformists have been working on a recall," reported Don Lake in a voicemail message last week. "We are quietly waiting for the sixth month.... We don't want to mess it up for other potential allies...."
Hear that? The whackdoodles and fringe politicos (we'll leave you to sort them out) are on the march. They're fed up with Mayor Dick Murphy and a city that's "run like a country club," so they're joining forces to oust him from office.
No, they don't have the dollars necessary to finance a recall effort or hundreds of thousands of registered supporters, but they do have cake-something every successful rebellion needs. Frosted with "Recall Murphy," one recall cake was already presented to City Councilmember Donna Frye last November by a coalition of Libs, Greens and reformists and now serves as proof, according to Lake, that the little guys were the first to float the big idea.
While a bit premature in their confectionary exuberance, the coalition has turned its ovens to preheat, after being reined in by county Democrats who insist they wait the full six months, as required by law, before baking any more recall goodies.
While that news probably isn't enough to send Murphy staffers scrambling for Nordstrom applications just yet, it's another in a series of omens indicating the mayor will eventually get his just dessert. And because we at CityBeat simply adore baking metaphors and can't keep our fingers out of the batter, we're offering up two more potential recall candidates who we think would make any recall recipe a little sweeter.
Best known as: San Diego County Supervisor: District 4 (1994-present)
Sign he's running: Despite previously saying his mayoral quest was finished, Roberts' people were more interested in grilling us for information about a potential recall than answering questions about an upcoming race for his supervisorial seat.
Why he's favored: Roberts garnered more than 25 percent of the vote on two of his three attempts for the mayor's office, which might secure a simple plurality in a recall race against multiple contenders. Coupled with his ability to raise lots of cash and high name recognition, it makes him a serious threat.
Stumbling points: None of those attributes has saved Roberts from failure before, and his unfulfilled aspirations are starting echo those of Pinocchio. Just picture Roberts in his jammies by a window, wish, wish, wishing upon the first star he sees tonight that one day he'll be a real big-city mayor rather than just a wooden county administrator.
Campaign slogan: "It's now or never. No, really, I mean it this time."
Best known as: "That Guy," Coffee just sort of hangs out at City Hall and related events chatting up unsuspecting bystanders, although no one seems to know exactly why he's there or whom he represents.
Sign he's running: Although Coffee is an "environmental attorney," he seems to have a lot of free time, which he devotes primarily to doing Murphy's bidding or just lurking in the shadows. Last year he participated in the mayoral recount as one of the mayor's representatives, but when asked recently whether Coffee had some sort of official role, a Murphy staffer just groaned, leading us to believe Coffee's either a sycophant or a stalker.
Why he's got a chance: There's something to be said for those who unselfishly devote themselves to public service, although the extent of Coffee's unselfishness, devotion or public service remains unclear. In any event, who better to pilot the city to its fiery doom after everyone else has come to their senses than a neglected true-believer.
Why he doesn't: Coffee is fueled by his contempt for City Attorney Mike Aguirre and, much like Darth Vader, his hatred may ultimately consume him.
B "At last it's mine-all mine. Bwah-ha-ha-ha!"