Who: Respected author/historian
Lie: Lifted text almost word-for-word from lesser-known (and more talented) historians. Later said he "forgot" to use quotation marks; also says he credited those writers in footnotes, but who reads footnotes?
Punishment: Not a whole lot because around the same time his fabrications came to light, Ambrose was already dying of cancer. He passed away October 2002; plagiarism allegations have been largely pushed aside.
Who: Football star turned actor turned alleged (alright, "acquitted") knife-wielding psychopath.
Lie: Though a jury disagreed, pretty much the whole world believes he killed his ex-wife Nicole and her pal Ron Goldman.
Punishment: Pretty much ostracized by fans and Hollywood, he's now golfing in Florida. That's gotta get really boring at some point.
Who: Former president who lied about involvement in the break-in at Democratic National headquarters in the Watergate Hotel.Lie: "I'm not a crook."
Punishment: Forced to resign as president before he could be impeached. Pardoned by Gerald Ford, but history will view him in a largely negative light.
Who: Sparkly pianist
Lie: Despite the platform shoes, piano-top candelabra and penchant for diamond studded capes, he claimed he wasn't gay.
Punishment: No punishment. He actually won a libel lawsuit against the Daily Mirror, which reported in a vitriolic manner that he was gay.
George W. Bush
Who: Our (sigh) current president
Lie: On primetime television, he lied about Iraq having weapons of mass destruction, lied about Iraq having something to do with Sept. 11 and lied about Iraq posing an imminent danger to America.
Punishment: None yet pending upcoming election.
Who: Bitchy domestic diva
Lie: Says she didn't get insider info on stock sale; jury says she did.
Punishment: There's already been way too many bad jokes about Martha in prison, so we won't go there.
Who: Former bad actor and president; aka "The Gipper"
Lie: In 1980 said trees cause more pollution than cars; in 1986 claimed that the U.S. didn't trade weapons to Iran in exchange for hostages; reveled in the story of the "Chicago welfare queen" who bilked the government of $150,000 dollars; the real amount was $8,000.
Punishment: None, thanks to his no-stick Teflon coating.
Who: Companies like Philip Morris, RJ Reynolds, Brown and Williamson
Lie: Told congressional committee under oath that tobacco isn't addictive.
Punishment: Made to look very foolish in anti-smoking commercials and the film The Insider. They're all still rolling in dough, however. Should have no problems finding lights for their cigs in hell.
Who: Puppet made famous in the Disney movie of the same name
Lies: Where do we even begin?
Punishment: Nose elongated with each lie he told, turning him into deformed freak. In the original story written in 1881 by Carlo Collodi, Pinocchio's nose is pecked back to normal size by woodpeckers-ouch. In the end, though, he's forgiven and rewarded by a fairy who turns him into a "real boy."
Boy Who Cried Wolf
Who: Fabled sheepherder
Lie: About presence of wolf.
Punishment: Lost all credibility; damned to cliché hell.
Who: Pixie-like actress, daughter of hippies
Lie: Says she didn't shoplift several thousand dollars' worth of clothes from Saks Fifth Avenue; a video camera showed otherwise.
Punishment: She looked so damn cute in those Marc Jacobs ensembles that a judge let her off with a fine, probation and community service. Last news is that she completed her 480 hours of volunteer work, hanging out with sick kids at City of Hope in Duarte-an "amazing experience," says her lawyer.
Peter the Apostle
Who: Jesus' right-hand guy
Lie: Shortly after Jesus' death, Peter was asked whether he'd been one of Jesus' followers. Peter, fearing for his own life, denied it.
Punishment: He apparently felt guilty and has gone down in history not as a liar but as the first head of the Catholic Church.
Who: New York real estate heiress, dubbed "the Queen of Mean."
Lie: "We don't pay taxes; only the little people pay taxes."
Punishment: Served 18 months in prison for tax evasion and mail fraud.
Who: One of the greatest baseball players ever
Lie: Repeatedly claimed he didn't bet on baseball.
Punishment: Banned from baseball; banned from the hall of fame
Anna Nicole Smith
Who: Busty former topless dancer turned model turned über ditz
Lie: Says she really, truly loved 89-year-old billionaire J. Howard Marshall, whom she married in 1994. He died the following year and Smith's been battling Marshall's son for the inheritance.
Punishment: Have you seen her TV show? Well, we guess that's really our punishment.
Who: German pop-rap duo
Lie: As one columnist put it, they "misrepresent[ed] their contributions to their own music." In other words, they lip-synched.
Punishment: Stripped of their 1990 Best New Artist Grammy
Who: Former, rather amorous, president
Lie: Says he didn't have sex with that shapely, bouncy-haired White House intern.
Punishment: Second president ever impeached (Andrew Johnson was the first); got a good lashing in the media; scorned and vilified by Republicans everywhere.
Who: Saturday Night Live's pathological liar, played by Jon Lovitz
Lie: You name it.
Punishment: Didn't actually get to have sex with Morgan Fairchild.